Party at my house

I came home from work last night to find this:

• A bottle of red wine laying broken on the floor
• An empty formerly dog-proof container for dog food on top of the coffee table.
• A sealed gallon of water seeping on to the carpet from giant teeth marks.
• Every cardboard box in the house torn to shreads.
• All but one curtain missing
• All the couch cushions on the floor
• The comforter from my bed in the hallway.
• Vomit on the side table
• Both dogs, who normally are trying to knock down the door to greet me, sitting on the shell of my couch just hanging out. Truck’s face stained red.

It was so bad that I could not react at all. I just set my stuff down, opened the back door and went to bed. Now at 3:15 am I have to deal with this mess. Today is Truck’s birthday. I was going to throw him a party, but it seems the boys threw their own party.

A Flasher

When I came home from work tonight, I found a flyer on the door from the neighborhood association. There is a flasher in my neighborhood. He is targeting little girls, but if I see him I will set the dogs on him. I have been showing Truck pictures of penises and telling him to attack.

Perhaps, this is why no one wants to date me.

He's practicing. (I'm not real good with a camera)

Why I love dogs

This is a great picture. I want a dog like that.

Heart Healthy Dogs

Last week I read that Adam Sandler’s bulldog, Meatball, died. I am not a Sandler fan, but I loved meatball’s movies. It seems that Meatball died of a heart attack at the age of 4. Truck is almost four. Bulldogs have bad health and while Truck is not a full bulldog, he does have a lifestyle similar to Louis XIV. So I have put him on a heart healthy diet and exercise plan. No more sharing my dinner with boys. This week Truck has to run up and down the street 3 times daily. Next week we will add another street to his run. Hopefully, we can get him up to a half mile. I want to get him down to his prime fighting weight of 89 pounds. Pasha gets lots of exercise, he spends hours chasing birds and squirrels, but he gets to run too. I could not handle losing my either of my boys.

Okay, Sparky, here's the deal

Sparky has to go. He is such a sweet dog and so friendly. He does not have any formal training (He does not know sit, stay, etc), but is house trained and very well-mannered. My mom suggested that I send Truck to the shelter and keep Sparky, but that ain’t gonna happen.

Unless someone offers to keep Sparky for the next week, he is going to the Pet Hotel, which means that I have to take the afternoon off work. Take him to the vet to get all his shots, then take him over the to the Pet Hotel, till next Sunday when he will go to the Animal Care Society as sponsored (by me) dog until he finds a loving home.

Sparky jumped the fence to get into my yard, I think this must mean, I am such a good doggy mom that dogs are breaking in just for me to take care of them. If I don't find Sparky's owner soon he is going to cost me a fortune. The next hound that breaks into my home is going to jail. Rehabilitation is just not cost-effective.

Annoyance #391: My new dog Sparky

It looks like I have another huge dog. I let the dogs out this morning and left the back door open to let some fresh air in the house since it warmed up to 45. About an hour later I heard all this barking in the kitchen and went to investigate. It was then I discovered a strange dog just hanging out with the boys. The new dog is an unfortunate looking German Shepherd mix, but appears to be of excellent temperament and in good health, if not a little thin. I some how managed to get him out of the house and spent an hour walking him around the neighborhood asking if anyone recognized him. No one did, so I brought him back home to find out what I could do about him. Unless I want to send him to the pound, I have to keep him for 7 days until the no-kill shelter will take him. I offered a bribe, but they said it was against the law.

Pasha and the new dog seem to be getting on well, but Truck has been his usual jerk self. Truck will not leave my side, as if he is guarding me and attacks Sparky if he gets too uppidity. I keep a bucket of water with me at all times to throw on them if they start fighting. I have to find this dog a home tomorrow, I am getting nothing done. It looks like I won’t be able to go see Win a date with Tad Hamilton tonight. Damn.