I do not know why I did not think of this when I was unattached, but strip clubs are the perfect place to pick up men. Last weekend, I was at one of our local gentlemen’s clubs with a few friends. I was standing watching a trashy looking blond (I have a thing for trashy looking blonds) writhe around the stage with my friend C. Now C has many things going for her, but the most impressive is her ability to wrap her legs behind her neck and her tits are bigger than mine. Anyway, as we were standing there these two guys approached and started chatting us up. They were good-looking, funny and one was delightfully twisted, but all I could think was where were you when I spent 3 fucking years without a date. Then I remembered where they weren’t: In the house I never left.